note to my mom....
dear mom, i'm trapped in my own world.
there's nowhere to go, no where to run.
wish i could turn to you to hold.
yet your coercing nature burns me like sun
dear mom, i wish that you could see.
how your boyl is lost of hope.
he's trying to be the best that he can be.
yet you asked him to be a pseudo.
dear mom, i'm a boy with lots of dreams.
i know i caused yours unfulfilled.
i'm sorry to ruined your youth like it seems.
never knew being born was a burden i must carry as a guilt.
dear mom, i wish i was born because of love.
instead i was born as a matter of lack of responsibility.
every night i'd pray to mighty God above.
i wish i was born because i was wanted in my own family.
dear mom, we're different as you can see.
what you did does not assure it's what i'll do.
the mistake you did, you made it a reason to blame everything on me.
mom, i can be smart if you'd let me learn from my own mistakes too.
dear mom, this is not me saying i hate you.
yet you need to perceive how i'm half man with pride.
happiness was everything i tried to give you.
somehow my attempts slowly killing me from inside.
dear mom, i wish you taught me to be strong.
instead i'm weak and unable to say NO.
i'm not saying you've grown me wrong.
i just wished you weren't too hard, now i'm too low.
dear mom, i wish you could be my shoulder to cry.
the home you built calms not my heart.
you acted like you wanted know me, but you never try.
the thought of you can't accept my flaws tears me apart.
dear mom, i'm not perfect and you can't claim me to be.
i wish i could show you truly who this boy really is.
but i doubt your love would not grow less on me.
so much i envy others who knew how mother's love is likely bliss.
dear mom, i know my face looks like guy who's like redneck.
but that doesn't mean that i'll look as same in you.
though i'm angry at you at times, i'll still love you no matter what.
even when you bring me down to my worst,still i'll always cherish you.
dear mom, i've tried so hard to make you believe.
even with every inch of vice you may find out.
i'm sorry for your every demand i failed to achieve.
i cant replace your life i took, i'm just what i'm all about.
dear mom, i'm sorry that i'm still here and alive.
my heart broke into pieces when you asked me to -----.
i did lost a lot of happiness but it didn't end my life.
it was painful mom, i tried my best but it was not easy at all.
dear mom, forgive me for being so veiled.
i'm petrified for you to know me better.
i never meant to be so weak and so full of wail.
hoping you could see me happy to be myself someday later.
dear mom, i'm sorry for everything i did.
i wish you're someone who'd understand most of me.
i hope someday you'd appreciate the things i succeed.
mom, i hope you'd love me for whoever i may be.
dear mom, i'm sorry for everything i am.
i'm sorry for everything i couldn't be.
i wish i could be more than just your blame.
forgive me mom, i hope someday you could love me for me.